� Number of people in attendance: 6

� Ratio of pies to people: 1:2

� Weight of the turkey (unstuffed): 21 lbs.

� Weight of the turkey as a percentage of AJ�s weight when weighed consecutively on the bathroom scale (at AJ�s request): 66%

� Percentage of turkey actually consumed by AJ: 0%

� Number of hours spent watching parades: 2

� Number of hours spent watching football: 6

� Number of hours watching something else: .75 (for the annual viewing of �A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving�)

� Number of hours spent playing football in the yard: 0 (alas, it was raining)

� Number of hours the cats spent locked in the basement to avert a disaster like the Great Turkey Mauling of 1998: 11

� Number of candles on display: 9

� Number of candles actually lit: 3

� Number of times the candles had to be relit because AJ insisted on singing �Happy Birthday� and blowing them out: 3

� Number of times AJ sprinted across the family room yelling, �I�m having fun!�: too many to count.

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