I should be working. Like Alice through the looking glass, it seems that the more I go forward the farther back I find myself. But right now I am relishing the first quiet morning in this house in a couple of weeks. At least until the repairman gets here.

The bed and breakfast is closed! At least for now. It was wonderful to see everyone who came, but I am a little tired of washing sheets and towels. The increase in laundry and bathroom usage seems to have taken a toll on our well pump, which has been cycling on and off at a rapid rate. This means that water comes out of faucets in aggressive spurts and showers are alternate blasts of hot and cold water. It�s quite invigorating in the jump-in-a-hot-tub-then-roll-in-the-snow kind of way. But I�m thinking the charm will wear off soon, but I�m thinking the charm is likely to wear off. We�ve opted to get the thing repaired. I�m just hoping it�s $100 problem and not a $1000 problem. The mysteries of the well are great and I am always afraid we might have to up and dig a new one � a very expensive project I don�t want to think about.

I feel I�ve done nothing but make lists of activities here lately. There�s been little time for reflection. And while I have the quiet and mental space for contemplation today, I�m feeling the pressure to buckle down. There�s a syllabus to finish, lectures to prepare, a conference paper to write, and the small matter of a dissertation to finish. Sometimes the weight of the work is oppressive, but right now the list of tasks is making me feel productive and almost invigorated. I hope it lasts.

Normally I hate to see the holidays end, but this year I am ready to move on with things. Still, we have had a lot of moments with AJ that remind us of the ephemeral nature of his world view. We need to stop and remember the things he says and does because they are gone in an instant. Last night, for instance, as we were reading a book about Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, a Christmas gift, AJ said, �I didn�t hear Santa on Christmas, but I heard Rudolph because his feet are so tiny.� �You heard Rudolph on the roof?� I asked. �Yes. His feet went �shh, shh.� I heard him when I sleeped.� �How do you know that sound wasn�t Santa?� �Because Santa has bells.�

Despite waking up at 3 a.m. wanting to play, AJ was full of energy this morning, fueled, no doubt, by his excitement to go back to school. He bounced into his classroom this morning and hurled his coat and hat to the floor in his excitement before he was reminded to hang them up in his cubby. I hope his friends make it to school today. There were only two others there when we arrived. The roads here are slick with ice and the perpetual sleet was knitting patches of ice to the windshield as I drove. I was grateful to be only six blocks away. If the weather gets any worse, we�ll have to skate home.

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