It is the third day of the influenza invasion. Our soldiers are weary. We�ve sent out calls for reinforcements, but they have not yet arrived, being variously detained by their own affairs. Private AJ has bravely pressed on in his glassy-eyed stupor and even requested preschool detail this morning, although when he returned it was obvious that it had been more than he had been up to. Sergeant Harriet, who was leading the troops valiantly yesterday evening was felled by a sniper attack in the early morning hours and confined to quarters. She�ll be shipped off to the medics tomorrow morning, but in the meantime, Private AJ and Lieutenant Husband are soldiering on. If this letter reaches you across the enemy lines, please send help. Or maybe orange juice. And some of that cough syrup with codeine. Mmm. Codeine.

0 people said it like they meant it