spynotes ::
  January 19, 2007
I believe, I believe, it's silly, but I believe

I should, perhaps clarify the religion thing that came up in yesterday�s entry. First, about the family. My husband and his family are Catholic. I am not. I have been affiliated in one way or another with a number of religious institutions over time, but the only one I�ve felt at home in was the extremely left-leaning Episcopal church I attended in college. I liked it because, as lemming mentioned in her comment on yesterday�s entry, I like to argue about the phrasing of the questions, not listen to someone who has all the answers (nor, for that matter, do I want to be one who has all the answers). It is this latter variety of religious person � a person who comes in the guise of any number of religions and denominations � with whom I have little patience and it is this type of person who has made me skeptical of religion in general.

Mr. Spy�s family has been extremely thoughtful in approaching religion with us. We got married in a Catholic church and had AJ baptized in a Catholic church, but never once have I felt like they have tried to force their brand of religion on me. Quite the opposite � they go out of their way to be considerate about it (as they do about most things � they are exceptionally nice people). Mr. Spy�s sister asked me if it was okay before she gave AJ the book of Bible stories. Technically, she didn�t have to do that. Technically, it�s her job to make sure AJ�s getting some religion � she�s his godmother and that�s one of the things she promised to do in the baptismal ceremony. I said sure, because I think everyone needs to know some Bible stories because a) they�re good stories (we�re talking Old Testament here) and b) it makes sense to have an understanding of a book that�s influenced so many for so long.

I�m sure I�ve written about this here before, but when I was a kid, my parents were pretty much at the stage about religion that I am at now. We attended many different services over the years, mostly Protestant (from Unitarian to Episcopalian and everything in between), which was the only religion under consideration. But they also made sure we attended services at the local Catholic church, synagogue and, at one point, a mosque, in part to give us a chance to see what was out there.

As a singer, I�ve been privileged to sing in a similarly wide variety of religious institutions. I spent a fairly good chunk of the time I was singing most frequently divided between a Catholic church run by Franciscan friars, where I sang several times a week, and the Ukrainian Catholic churches (more of an Orthodox ceremony, but allied with Catholic rather than Orthodox institutions), two of the most ritual-filled services I could find. I loved it and I loved the variety. But I�m more in love with musical ritual than religion.

I am unnerved by the forced communities of churches. And yet I see them in action � as after the death of AJ�s friend�s father � and I am awed. I think theological questions are important ones. But I don�t want anyone telling me what the answers are. I also value skepticism. Skepticism means you�re thinking about it.

I wrestle with all this when it comes to AJ. On the one hand, I think he needs to be familiar with his Catholic heritage. On the other hand, I want him to be aware of what else is out there. Most important, I want him to be aware of the difference between theology and religion. And I want him to feel he can make a choice when he�s old enough to understand what he�s choosing, even if it means forcing him to go to church against his will once in a while so he gets a sense of what it�s all about.

I�ve got more to say about other things, but I�ll let this stand for now. I�ll try to post again later about our trip to the Laundromat and also to respond to Dr. Geek�s post about the poor mix of an album.

8 people said it like they meant it

 
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