On our last trip to Costco we purchased one of those miniature helium tanks in order to ensure that AJ�s birthday is full of balloons, some of his most favorite things. He saves the free balloons we get from shopping at Trader Joe�s for months, long after they have ceased to float ceilingward, long after they have even retained the least degree of inflation. But of course having such ready access to helium makes me want to relive elementary school squeaky voice contests. Sometimes I am so not a grownup.

AJ spent the morning playing birthday with the alphabet. It was A�s birthday today. He sang �Happy Birthday� to it and had the other letters watch while A opened his presents. The present-opening seems to be a source of anxiety for AJ, so I�m glad he�s practicing. Plus I really wanted to know what A was going to get for his birthday. What do you give the letter who has it all?

The letter A received two gumball machines (the kind with the spiral ramps so the gumball rolls around and around. There�s one of these in our favorite diner that fascinates AJ endlessly) and something called �balls and slides and holes,� which I haven�t entirely identified, but I think is a toy AJ likes at preschool, and a car with the number 1 on it. I am hoping this last one is not a stand in for the General Lee of �Dukes of Hazzard� fame, a show that this guy calls �the greatest TV show in the history of the medium.� I�m pretty sure I wouldn�t have used those words, although I am ashamed to admit that my brother and I were fairly regular viewers as kids. Plus the show spawned a spinoff called �Enos,� which was, as far as I know, the only television show in history to have a name rhyming with penis. What could be funnier to a couple of pre-pubescent geeks like us?

Needless to say, AJ will not be receiving any Dukes of Hazzard paraphernalia for his birthday.

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