Driving home from the library yesterday we were stuck behind a van with an �Abortion stops a beating heart� bumper sticker next to one that read �Sure you can have my gun, BULLETS FIRST.� Does anyone else find this to be a conflict of interest? However, seeing as the van had a gun rack in the back and assorted tourist stickers indicating frequent visits to Montana, we decided not to argue with the logic.

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When passing a local costume shop, we noticed they were decked out for Easter. Two of the four models in the window were dressed in rather terrifying bunny costumes, suitable for children�s parties or bank heists. The third was a cute and fuzzy lamb costume. The fourth was a minidress in fuchsia satin with a pair of white patent leather go-go boots. Nothing says �Easter� like go-go boots.

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Sign spotted on a recent drive: Anodyne Corporation Medical Supplies. The word �anodyne� always makes me think instantly of the Emily Dickinson poem �Heart, not so Heavy.� Several years ago I conducted a performance of some choral works of Elliott Carter, including a setting of that poem. One of my singers kept insisting on a schmaltzy glissando on the word �anodyne,� which was followed up by an militaristic staccato on the word �bobolink� in the next line of the poem. As we�re passing the corporation, this silliness is going through my head. Who says there�s no poetry in suburbia? Alas, the company appears to be having a going out of business sale.

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The local fine dining establishment, a French country restaurant with very good food, is sandwiched in between a tattoo parlor and a taxidermist across the street from a soybean field. Location, location, location.

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On the way out of town, there is the back half of a semi parked alongside of the road, nicely painted with an advertisement. Unfortunately, the phone number in the ad seems to have been wrong, so using black spraypaint, someone crossed out the wrong number and crookedly scrawled the correct one underneath. The business advertised? Sign painters.

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Giant Cows!

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