My advisor has an uncanny knack for sending comments on things I�ve given him at the exact point I think I�m all finished. I had e-mailed him my paper a week or two ago (I don�t always send him my conference papers, but he offered this time, I think because he�s feeling bad that he�s still sitting on my chapters). He�s traveling in Europe at the moment, doing assorted lectures, so I accompanied the paper with a note that basically said don�t worry about getting back to me before the conference, but I�d still like him to look at it because I�ve submitted the proposal for a couple of other conferences as well, blah, blah, blah. So I�d kind of forgotten about it. I finished what I thought was the final tweaking a couple of days ago. I spent this morning at Kinko�s copying my handouts. I got home and had a look at the directions to the conference on Mapquest. I was feeling good about my work and organized. I was looking forward to a relaxing evening. And then I checked my e-mail.

There it was. I was almost afraid to look at it. I stared at the icon in my inbox for a minute and then proceded to read every other e-mail in the box. Finally, when I could avoid it no longer, I opened it. It was good, really. It should be making me feel more secure about this presentation. The first three paragraphs talk use words like �excellent� and �brava� and �interesting� and �thoughtful.� His principal criticism was that I�d done a little too much work. I�d been so worried about this paper being too lightweight, but he feels that I actually put in too much detail. The last two paragraphs of his email, however, make suggestions for how to revamp it. Which I now feel completely obliged to do. Because clearly those first three paragraphs mean nothing and my paper�s really a piece of crap.

In fact, I am sure I�m meant to take it at face value. I just can�t seem to do it. Part of me thinks I should leave well enough alone. But the rest of me knows that if I don�t mess around with it, I�m not getting any sleep tonight. It seems I am unable to avoid the night-before anxiety. I leave early tomorrow for parts north. Who knows what the paper will look like by then. Sorry for being mopey. I�ll be less surly when I return from my adventures in the Dairy State.

0 people said it like they meant it